Sunday, June 28, 2009

My Week in Review

My last two weekends have been pretty lame. Not sure what the deal is with me...I'm not in a full-fledged funk, but I'm definitely flirting with one. This is especially problematic as I am approaching my birthday in a couple of weeks. My birthday is a BIG deal and I love it and always want everything to be perfect--last year was pretty great and I hope this year is even better.

I didn't really go out much the last two weekends. Maybe I am still trying to catch up and recover from the insanity of work the last few weeks. Anyway, here's my week in review:


  • Had to buy four new tires following last week's flat.
  • It was a week full of fatalities: DC Metro crash, Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, Michael Jackson
  • I think I have started to grind my teeth again while I'm typing...I might be doing it right now! Ugh!

Sunday, June 21, 2009

You can't change a man...but I can change a tire...

Yesterday, I did something I don't do often: I got up early...on a Saturday. I was actually doing pretty well at being up and at 'em and dressed and out the door early to pick up KB and go the the National Cathedral to watch our friend's confirmation (yes, I was up early and in a church...try to contain your surprise) until I got to my car and found out I had a flat tire. I had to brave the rain, hop a bus, then the metro, then a cab and was still 15 min late. The Cathedral is beautiful and it's so huge that it actually wouldn't have been that big of a deal to walk in late, (since people are walking around taking tours even during services) except I was wearing loud heels (of course!). So i had to tip-toe in and looked a little crazy, but I'm glad we were able to be there for our friend.

Now back to the tire. I thought about my options yesterday, but decided I would handle it today. On the advice of a friend, I walked a couple of miles to an auto repair store and bought a can of fix-a-flat, but it wasn't working. I thought about leaving it until later in the week since my car is legally parked on my street and I don't need to drive for a few days, but I didn't want this hanging over my head. I ran through a list of people (let's just say it: men) I could call and vetoed all of them. I would rather pay than ask someone and feel like I am inconveniencing them...the only exception to this is family or a boyfriend...of which I have neither here. Involving a man just seemed more complicated so I sucked it up, watched an ehow video and did it myself.

This is the first time I have ever changed a tire and I am quite proud of myself! I'm from a family where women don't even pump their own gas, and as much as I reject and defy most of my upbringing, I have to admit, I liked being the girl that had car stuff handled by a guy. Since it's Father's Day, I talked to my dad today and informed him of my automobile victory - I think I crushed him. He was so upset he wasn't here to do it and that I had to do it myself. The first thing he said was "you couldn't get a boy to do it?" It was cute in a way. I just told him it was easier this way. How do I explain to him that asking some guys would send the wrong message or complicate things or be not nice given I keep turning them down for dates or be held over my head forever like everything else from the last eight years?

My mom was very proud at least.

The Last Three Weeks

The last three weeks have been an absolute whirlwind.

From the moment I got the call about Dr. Tiller's murder, I have been going nonstop. I have fielded more press calls than I can remember, written alerts for our members, talking points, and a eulogy. I watched my boss do tapings at NPR and appear on Rachel Maddow. I even traveled to Wichita at the last minute to help at the funeral. 

I can honestly say I have never worked harder or been more tired in my entire life. Although the circumstances have been terrible, I am very proud of the work I have done these last few weeks. 

Like any death, the past few weeks have given me perspective.  So many cliches come to mind: life is short, seize the day, say what you need to say. It's a reminder to not play games and not wait by the phone. When it comes to people and relationships, I wish I was better about going after what I want. Blame the southern belle in me, but I am typically the one who waits for the guy to call and make the move...that's just me. Still, an event like this makes you reevaluate your course and remember the important people in your life.

So many of you have called or texted to check in with me during this time and it means the world to me. Thank you. I have amazing people in my life and whether I tell you often enough or not, please know that I know it.